


Salty Coffee

by DeadBreadDead



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Demon Shane Madej
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:28:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22190302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadBreadDead/pseuds/DeadBreadDead
Summary: In which Ryan puts salt in Shane's coffee, and uses it as proof he's a demon when he spits it out.
Relationships: Ryan Bergara & Shane Madej
Comments: 4
Kudos: 230





	Salty Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> Entirely based on https://pin.it/visg36ileiwtwi  
> This was made between a friend and I when we saw it on pinterest, texted back and forth.

{Shane's POV}

Ryan and I sat across from eachother. I took a sip of the coffee he had just brought me, and spit it out. 

"Ryan! What the fuck did you put in my coffee?"

"YOU SPIT THE SALT OUT, DEMON!" Ryan yelled, pointing an accusatory finger at my chest. So that's what that was?

"YOU PUT SALT IN MY COFFEE! ANYBODY WOULD SPIT IT OUT!" I retaliated, I couldn't have him finding out my secret; Not until I could tell him in private, away from everyone watching the scene.

"THAT'S WHAT A DEMON WOULD SAY!" Ryan screeched, and I had to hold back my laughter.

"RYAN. SALT DOES NOT GO IN COFFEE. IT DOES NOT TASTE GOOD? DO YOU THINK A DEMON WOULD CARE HOW COFFEE TASTES?" I laughed, why did he think this would work? I just wanted coffee since we just finished filming at the Goatmans Bridge. Well, My Bridge I guess.

“YES, EVEN IF YOU’RE A DEMON YOU NEED COFFEE TO TASTE DECENT SHANE!" Well, he had a point there.

"YOU CAN'T BLAME ME FOR SPITTING IT OUT!" My hands flew up in the air as I defended myself.

“YES.I.CAN.DEMON!" I almost sighed at Ryan's persistence; But it also brought a smile to my lips, he was right after all.

"I AM NOT A DEMON RYAN, I SPIT OUT SALTY COFFEE!" My voice went unnaturally high.

“SAVE IT, I’M GETTING MY HOLY WATER— WHERE DID I PUT MY HOLY WATER?!” I laughed as he furiously pat his pockets, the crowd gathered chuckling as well.

"WHY DO YOU HAVE HOLY WATER? WE'RE AT BUZZFEED HEADQUARTERS!" I honestly wasn't even surprised; I'd be more surprised if he didn't have any here.

“I ALWAYS HAVE HOLY WATER, ANOTHER REASON YOU’RE A DEMON. YOU DON’T HAVE HOLY WATER” He looked at me as if it were crazy that I don't carry Holy Water on me at all times.

"ITS JUST WATER SOME PRIEST HAD A CONVERSATION WITH AND SAID OKAY YOU'RE HOLY NOW" I know that's not exactly how it works, but for the sake of this argument that's what I'm pretending.

"YOU'RE ALSO THE ONLY ONE HERE WITH HOLY WATER" I yelled, before he had the chance to correct my statement.

“IT’S BLESSED SHANE!" He defended the holy water, which was amusing to me. It's an inanimate object; Why defend it?

"ITS BLESSED SHANE," I mocked, "SO IF I LOOKED AT SOME WATER AND DID THAT WEIRD LITTLE HAND CROSS THINGY WOULD THAT MAKE IT HOLY??"

“SHANE YOU’RE NOT A FUCKING PREIST NOW WHERE DID I PUT MY HOLY WATER? SHIT IT’S IN THE CAR STILL FROM THE GOATMAN STUFF” Ryan yelled, apparently panicking about leaving it in the vehicle.

"YOU LEFT IT IN THE WATER GUN?" I wheezed, "RYAN, R Y A N, IF ITS SO IMPORTANT THEN MAYBE TAKE CARE OF IT?"

“SHUT UP, I’M GOING TO GO GET IT STAY THERE, DEMON!" Ryan turned and speed walked towards the door, leaving me behind standing there, with a nearly full cup of coffee in my hand.

I laughed as I watched my best friend walk off to the car. I wonder what he would say if he knew he was right all along.


End file.
